Give some typical assignments for a person who is depressed. Next, do
the same for a person who worries. Finally, do the same for a person who is afraid. Don’t
discuss what you would do in giving assignments; rather give actual assignments as you would write
them down for the counselee.
In all three of
these classifications (depression, worry, fear) of problems I may assign a
“Journal of Upsets” in the first few sessions to gather more data about the
causes, frequency, duration, and counselees responses to their problem(s). I always find this very insightful, and also
a springboard to more practical homework assignments for the counselee. Also, the booklet “Christ and Your Problems”
by Jay Adams is a resource I often assign the first week or so to give them
hope, and get them thinking about how Christ provides answers and resolutions
to their personal situation.
A person dealing
with depression is desperate for hope. I
may ask them to make a daily practice of listing things they are thankful for,
five in the morning, and five before bed.
Write them down daily, and bring them in to the next session. After listing the blessings on paper I would ask
that they pray in gratitude to God for them.
I would require them to do their best at faithfully fulfilling their
responsibilities (wife/husband, mother/father, daughter, student, employee,
church member, etc) regardless of how they feel. Focusing on obedience to God, not
feelings. Then weekly ask in
accountability how this is going, if they failed how, what did they do to
correct that failure? (Repent, ask forgiveness, purpose to change). This may involve a checklist created together
with the counselee that can be a motivator/personal inventory for them to
review throughout their days. Memorizing
Philippians 4:8,9 and developing a go-to list of Godly, helpful thinks they can
think on will help then curb their thought life to Christ, and the truth. I may also ask them to do at least two fun
things in a week, and come back ready to tell me about it. This is to instill joy, lightheartedness, and
reinvigorate their lives.
A person who worries
would also benefit from memorizing Philippians 4:8,9, or Colossians 3:2, or
Matthew 6:25-34. I may ask them to write
it out on a 3X5 card, review the verse during their morning devotions; and pray
asking God specifically to help them not to sin by worrying but rather think on
truth, His character, and to have faith in their circumstances. I would ask them to keep the 3X5 card with
them throughout the day, and when worry creeps up review the passage, and ask
themselves questions that we together have developed to change their
thinking. For example; Is this true? What am I telling God I believe about Him
when I worry about this? Can I change
this? Will my worrying help in anyway? Has God ever failed? Will He now?
Pray, and praise rather than worry and wonder. A few booklets I like to assign on worry are; “Releasing Worry and Finding Worth as a
Woman” by Charles Swindoll, and “Worry: Pursuing a Better Path to Peace” by
David Powlison. I may ask a counselee
who worries to set aside time three times during the coming week to interact
with a Godly, encouraging Christian about anything that would be mutually
beneficial (Ephesians 4:29,30), this would facilitate them getting their
thoughts off themselves, and hopefully enable them to see God at work in a
larger context beyond their life, and experience.
A
person trapped in fear needs to assess what God given responsibilities they are
neglecting because of their fear. I may
ask them to analyze their lifestyle during the coming week and write down every
responsibility they are neglecting due to their fear, and bring it with them
the following week. I could then focus
our discussion in the next session on 1 John 4:18 “…perfect love casts out
fear….” and 2 Timothy 1:7; “For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but
of power and love and discipline.” One by one addressing each listed neglect
from homework assignment; helping them see how love can enable them to stop
neglecting their responsibilities, and overcome their fear, enabling righteous
obedience to God, and fulfilling their God given roles. “If you substitute love for fear in your life
as well as in your language, you can do what love impels you to do.”1 Then the next week their homework could be
practically doing what we talked about, and tracking weather there was
improvement/change in taking on their responsibilities that have been
neglected, and why or why not. I may
require a fearful counselee to read Philippians 4:4-9 once daily until our next
meeting, and have them answer the following questions; What commands are there to obey? What promises/comforts are there to
claim? What are the qualifications
listed for what we allow ourselves to dwell on/think about?
1
“What to Do When Fear Overcomes You”, Jay Adams
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