Swiping the crusty debris from my eyes, the warmth and light is penetrating much too early. Or is it early? No, this new day feels right on time. I don't feel weary, I don't perceive pain. I haven't even opened my eyes, but my senses are telling me this morning is like no other before.
Can it be? No brain fog? No shame to keep me fighting to remain horizontal when I know I should move. Is it possible? Already? No. But everything already feels so different this morning. No headache, no hesitancy of heart. No tyranny of the urgent that I really don't want to answer. Just peace.
I still hear the gorgeous lilt of the sparrow song, and the oriole chiming in, and the wrens in all their species over a valley that I know I'm still near because the familiars are still there. The morning dewy moisture is felt, and the temperature feels like this time of year.... in a season of familiar and yet so not the norm.
I move my left hand, and feel for the ring. Yep, it's there, and feels just right. I turn my head left, and then slowly spin my neck to the right. That pop that often happens in the morning didn't. Hmmm. Sweet. That hollow feeling in my loins is not present. That's just wild. Or is it? I reach my right hand, just a bit to feel over the cool cotton sheets to reach out and know..... Yes, there he is. My partner, quietly slumbering, and warm. Mmmmmm! My heart is grateful, so much to thank the Maker for. And this day as all days, begins with worship, a choice. Pause. Breathe, in, out.
My lung capacity is full, deep and renewed. My rib that I once damaged by lifting too much doesn't even ache. I have not felt this way in the morning before. I want to open my eyes, but I also want to just relish in the opulence that is morning slowly, and let it all sink in.
A tune that's familiar, a song that I've had in my mind for decades of living springs to my mind. Without hesitation or memory uncertain, each note plays like an orchestra on the grass as the woodwinds, the buzz of the insects provide a percussion that seems subtle and yet is there. Those afore mentioned birds, they begin to assemble their songs to bring a harmony that takes that old familiar and makes it a classic to new proportions. And that's just the background of this orchestra in my mind. My experiences of scent, taste, touch, and awareness seem to burst into bloom as the Author intended. A song about the Maker, the One who was before the globe spun. A song penned by Himself, and yet not one note speaks pride. That One, the only Perfection. Ah...... what bliss.
Shall I open the eyes? I reach for his hand, quietly to sense where he is in his slumber. I know with certainty as so many mornings before, I want to share this with him. I want us to do this day, this new day together. In a deeper way than never before.
I wonder; my mind begins the curious train with youthful enthusiasm I lost decades ago. “Will I meet the Author today?” “Is this the New World?” Oh, He's been working, and making, perfecting and preparing a place. Pause. Breathe in, and out. My minds train is running much too fast. Or is it? I've never processed thoughts so easily. No socio-economic angst and skepticism that clouds all I perceived from my angle on things. Is it possible that the brokenness of how my worldview of justice was fabricated in me is no longer there? It's always been hard to gather my thoughts, well not always..... that's not quite true; that issue grew as time passed day by day, year, by longer year in the waiting. No today, there's that lightness of mind that all is made new, anything is possible.
I reach that right hand over my rising and falling chest filling lungs with the purest air and feel.... The old familiar heart-shape locket right there, in it's place. A token, a promise of more. More than you've ever known, more than you can even possibly imagine. This little etched and tarnished memento of precious metal hanging on a frail chain held so many times before to remind me; hope is real.
This tiny keepsake is monetarily worth so little by a dollar point of view, but to me is a precious reminder, and gift from a Father who gave it to me with a Love promise that He would never ever stop His grace, His plan, once I took that tiny gift, and made it my own. Once that gift was in my hand, and then fastened around my neck, I knew I belonged, not because of the token, but because it was proof, He'd extended a present, a grace undeserved. He gave His most precious Son to make the present possible.
Ah, the welling emotion of peace and security are an oddity in a broken and marred place. Or am I somewhere new? Can it be? Is it true?
All of sensory capacities are fully on, and I have not even lifted my head. No caffeine to wipe the cobwebs from my fuzzy brain. No concerns about the looming “stuff” on that list. I wonder, is that list even there? I will only know if I take the risk, and open my eyes. I feel deep down in a place within me that was there with the Father before the foundations of this rolling dust ball was spoken into place that this New Day is a day of all days. I so want it to be true.
All this processing and sensory trip, sounds like I'm afraid, and taking my time, but you know what? There is no time. What? No time? No time but the present. Ah, that's confirmation for certain.
No past to rehearse; just the now. Alright...... I grasp again the hand on my right, and I squeeze, as I have for countless mornings before..... And I take the plunge, I lift my eye lids and see.
My every sense awakens in a newness never experienced. My mind knows, and thoughts dialogue: “Oh, my goodness of all the goodness that can be. It is.” Without corrective lenses, just the open sky above the clouds with magnificence, yet little else in my peripheral view. I know. I know like I was trained to know, that the day has come! It's come. Hope restored. The King on His throne. The first questions of my ever learning mind are already answered deep in my soul; with just instinct and knowledge passed on based on what He said in the Word. And for certain that one that personal choice to be in, all in all those years ago has finally come to be a reality only ever believed.
I feel the response squeeze from my Beloved next to me, and I know today's adventure will top all the rest. Nothing will be off, it will be His Perfection revealed.
His name is on both of our lips, my life partner and I. We twist our necks toward one another and there's not a hint of bad breath. We kiss like that very first time, and now look in each other's faces. I see in his deep eyes that he knows it too. Together, simultaneously our cheeks rise, and our white teeth reveal; no cracks, no stains, no dental fixes, even no plaque. No wonder the breath of us both smelled so fresh, and pure. This is more than the mind can possibly take in, oh but even that's made right.
The first word uttered between us, that partner and I is; His name. “Jesus” we say together in unison. With nods of our heads, and new marrow, new flesh, we bound up. Then clasp the other's hand, and at just the right pace to observe this New Earth, we set out like every other day, yet on this day we know, It's the Day for face to face interactions with Him; our Saviour.
