Significance of Ephesians 4:17-25 in Biblical Counseling | ACBC Exam Question #36

       Explain the significance of Eph. 4:17-25, and similar passages for Biblical counseling.

Ephesians 4:17-25 is a powerful text in Biblical counseling because; it alludes to the difference between secular psychology/counseling, shows that a new life in Christ is required in order to transform a life and it’s purpose for existence, and it also gives us clear guidelines for how lasting change happens.

First we see that without Jesus we can’t be different (vs. 17-19).  Without salvation all attempts at purposeful living are futile.  Unregenerate people are blinded, ignorant, hard-hearted, greedy and hopelessly bound to sin.  Because the counseling offered by unsaved people does not address the sin problem, it can provide coping mechanisms, behavioural modification, and shifting of blame, but it cannot provide real help or hope as it is apart from Christ.  He is the truth (vs. 20), the One who makes all heart-level change possible.     

Secondly, it is clear that faith in Christ must take place before Biblical change can happen.  We must switch Masters before we can effectively change (Romans 6).  Until a person comes to a personal faith in Jesus to forgive their sins, and enable them to righteous living they are just spinning their wheels in the mud of sin, trying to clean themselves up, when what they need first is rescue out of the mud all together.  “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)  We need to have a new life from the root level (heart decision) in order to produce a changed life (purpose, motives, thinking, actions).

Lastly this passage outlines how lasting change can change take place.  It is a total replacement from the old man (pre-salvation, bound to sin) to the new man (made righteous through Christ, able to not sin) (vs. 22-23).   The change begins in the mind (vs. 23). 

“Have you ever cooked rice in a rice cooker? You pour the dry rice and water into the appliance, plug it in, and click the switch to turn on the heat. The water steams and infuses itself within the grains of rice. The rice becomes robust and saturated. This is what happens when we receive counsel. We mentally saturate our heart with either healthy or poisonous water. The counsel produces robustness in our lives corresponding to the quality possessed.”¹

                God is the ultimate Counselor who changes our hearts and lives (Psalm 32:8).  In counseling we have the privilege and responsibility to help our counselees renew their mind by presenting Biblical truth to them about their particular sin problem or circumstances.  When their thinking is in line with Scriptural truth, they will learn how to live out those truths in their actions.  They can say “No!” to sin and apply the Scripture that promises “No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13).  Replacing sin with righteous choices (and then habits) is possible like verse 25 gives example of; “Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.”  Being connected in relationship to Christ, who enables us to deny self and sin, we can choose to live in righteousness, stop sinning, and replace those motives, thinking and behaviour with what is right.  Biblical counseling is leading others through this process, coming along side and aiding them in their sanctification.   

                This passage is a cornerstone for what Biblical counseling is, why it is effective, and the process by which we (through Christ and God’s Word) lead people to genuine change.   

 ¹ http://biblicalcounselingcoalition.org/blogs/2014/05/05/developing-a-biblical-theology-of-emotions/

Language in Counseling | ACBC Exam Question #35

    Define and describe the importance of language in counseling. Give examples.

The words we speak are always important.  They are the outflow of our hearts (Luke 6:45).  And Scripture warns us, “But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment.” (Matthew 12:36)  In counseling we are ministering to people who will put a lot of stock on our words.  What we say will guide their view of God, their situation, themselves, and how they need to respond to their circumstances and change.  We need to take seriously the responsibility we have before God to these people we serve; and be intentional, selective and wise in what and how we speak to our counselees.

“….speaking the truth in love….” (Ephesians 4:15) ought to be our guiding principle.  We need to be sure our advice is rooted in God’s Word, and if we are not 100% positive, tell our counselee that upfront, and commit to finding out what God’s standard is in that area, and get back to them.  We ought not to ever speak “off-the-cuff” when we don’t know for sure, it’s much better to take the time to research a biblical response than to defer to our own opinion or experience. “He who restrains his words has knowledge….” (Proverbs 17:27)

Pointing out sin is vital, but should not be done with a tone of belittling or judgement.  We should never respond with astonishment, being surprised by the depth of a persons’ sin.  Saying things like “I would never think you could do something like that” or “That was stupid!” is inappropriate. Asking questions that lead them to determine their own guilt before God is a wise way to help them determine right from wrong.  For example, if a wife comes to counseling who is entertaining thoughts of adultery with a co-worker, some questions to probe their hearts, and understand their knowledge of it being wrong may include; “What do you think God says about what you just told me?”  “In your perception of this situation at what point did you become guilty of sin?” We can note their comprehension of Biblical truth and standards, and clarify if necessary.   This wife would need to know that entertaining the temptation to lust is the root issue, it is never okay to even think about another man that way (Matthew 5:27-28).     

Our words need to be affirming, and hopeful.  “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” (Proverbs 16:24)  When the people we counsel are making progress, or have done their homework well, give them praise.  Even when their situation seems dire, assure them of God’s presence, and help them remember His sovereign goodness.  There is always hope when Christ is our anchor (Hebrews 6:19).

Halo Data | ACBC Exam Question #34

      Define "halo data" and give some examples of halo data for depression.

Halo data is observable information gathered nonverbally.  Facial expressions, gestures, volume and tone of voice, use or lack of eye contact, posture, body language, tears, habits of showing up late, willingness to answer questions/avoid them, and so much more can give us cues as to our counselees character, as well as what they are feeling.   There are examples of halo data in Scripture.  Genesis 3:8 says “And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden.”  We can gather from this verse that Adam and Eve knew they were guilty even though they have not yet spoken a word.  Their choice to conceal themselves is halo data which reveals a lot.  We read of Cain in Genesis 4:5, “but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his face fell.”  You could read Cain’s facial expression, and perceive his heart response.  There is much to be gleaned by being acutely aware of nonverbal communication expressed.  “Never underestimate the importance of this kind of observation; it can provide as much information as merely concentrating on what the counselee says.”¹ The information we can gather by observing halo data will be useful in helping our counselees change. 

Some examples of typical halo data that can be observed in a counselee who is suffering from depression would include; slumped posture, downcast eyes, lack of a smile, weariness, disheveled physical appearance (unkempt hair, no desire to keep oneself clean or looking presentable), frequent crying, quietness, unwilling to talk, negative reaction to all questions or biblical help (example: “it won’t matter/help”), no enthusiasm or optimism to things that would normally bring them joy (mentioning a loved one, an enjoyed activity, etc.), and overall hopelessness.  Someone dealing with depression may sigh frequently, cross their arms over their chest, and distance themselves from the counselor physically, or turn away to avoid eye contact.  Though these actions are predictable to a person who is depressed we should not assume that depression is a true diagnosis for our counselee based on perceived indicators alone, this type of halo data would also be common for many other issues as well.  Halo data is only one part of data gathering, and a fraction of the whole picture we must be sure to gather all the information carefully to best determine our counselees’ problems and what will help them through.      

¹ “Counseling: How to Counsel Biblically”, John MacArthur, page 145

Complicating Problems | ACBC Exam Question #33

        Define a "complicating problem".  Give a concrete example.

              

           Like when knitting if you don’t follow the pattern properly, but neglect to notice right away, and continue on with a row of stitches; you, have to take out those stitches in order to reach and correct the mistake.

          “Complicating problems can make it nearly impossible to reach principal problems until the complications are cleared away. That is to say, they are of such a nature that, having grown out of principal problems, they have so complicated the original principal problem that it is not longer reachable except through them.”1 

                For example; In Genesis 15-18 We read of Abram and Sarai as they faced the problem of infertility while having the promise of God that their descendants would be numerous, like the stars (vs. 5).  Rather than patiently waiting on God to work this miracle in her barren womb, Sarai creates a complicating problem by suggesting to Abram that he bare a child with Hagar, their Egyptian servant.  Then, when Ishmael is born, Hagar and Sarai are bitter and jealous (vs. 4).  Sarai blames Abram (vs. 5).  Instead of leading, and address the situation biblically, Abram tells Sarai to handle it (vs. 6). Sarai could have seen her fault, and repent of her sin to Abram, Hagar, and most of all, God;  but she is harsh, and this relationship is cut-off as Hagar leaves, to fend for herself (vs. 6).  

The main problem is still Abram and Sarai’s infertility, but it has been complicated by their sin of doubting God, trying to solve the problem through sinful adultery, resulting in sinful jealousy and wrath in Sarai’s heart and actions.  It’s a messy knot because they sinful responded to the principle problem. God had promised a solution, but in their impatience and lack of faith they sinned, and rather than repent sinned some more. 

Just like Abram and Sarai complicated their situation by sin, we have done so in our own lives at times, and will counsel others who have done the same.  It is vital that we take the time when counseling to assess the different types of problems (presentation, performance, preconditioning, and complicating) involved, as there is usually more than one problem happening.  With wisdom, and the help of the Holy Spirit, we can unravel the knots sin creates and aid our counselees with God’s Word to restore their relationships with God, and others.           

           ¹ http://www.nouthetic.org/blog/?p=3484

Preconditioning | ACBC Exam Question #32

         Define the concept of “preconditioning level”. Use a case history, in which you were the counselor, to show the necessity for moving from the performance level to the preconditioning level.

“Preconditioning level” refers to the root level of a problem, where it comes from; motives, beliefs, habits, the thinking out of which performance and presentation problems arise.  “Habit patterns developed over many years must be replaced by new biblical patterns.  Otherwise the client will leave counseling still programmed (preconditioned) to handle life’s next crisis in the usual sinful way.  The debilitating or performance problem is simply one example of the underlying disposition to handle problems in such a manner.  The preconditioning problem is really a kind of computer problem.  The client has programmed himself by his past activity to act in certain ways in response to given stimuli.”¹ 

Because “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me.” (Psalm 51:5) is not only true for David, but you and I and every human being we battle sin at our very core.  “This is the judgment, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved the darkness rather than the Light, for their deeds were evil.” (John 3:19) We are bound to sin, and unable to live righteously apart from Christ, but once we are believers we are new from the inside out (2 Corinthians 5:17) and can reset our preconditioned programming from sinful, and wrong to truth, and God-honouring.  This takes time, intention, discipline and the Holy Spirit to guide and enable righteous living.  Right in the middle of Ephesians 4:17-32 about putting off sin, and putting on righteousness Paul writes; “…in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.” (vs. 22-24)

A counseling situation in which preconditioning thinking was key in aiding the counselee from performance level issues from my own experience involved a teen who was heavily wrapped up in self harm.  She was a cutter, and it was her physical way of taking blame on herself for wrongs done (low grades, not measuring up to peers standards, etc….).  It became clear that the underlying belief out of which this behaviour flowed was an improper view of God’s love for her.  She firmly believed she was saved by faith in alone in Christ alone, but somehow she had come to believe that she had to perform to maintain her standing with God.  She felt that if she didn’t read the Bible, witness enough to others, and all kinds of other actions then God didn’t love her the same, He’d be disappointed, less than happy with her…. This scale she created always left her less than perfect, feeling undeserving, and thus she had to punish herself, so she thought.  Getting to this root level preconditioning cause was vital in helping her break this thinking process in order to help her stop cutting herself.  Romans 8:38,39, Ephesians 1, and other Scriptural study lead her to comprehend that God’s love was in no way effected by her performance day-to-day.  God loves that teen girl fiercely, not for what she can do for Him, but simply because He can, He chooses to, He loves her, and that will never ever change.  Once she understood this, and it settled into her heart and changed her beliefs about God’s character she no longer felt compelled to harm herself, but could claim the unending love of God for herself.  What a freedom it gave her.  Life changing truth.

¹ “Competent to Counsel”, Jay Adams, page 149

Presentation Level and Performance Level Problems | ACBC Exam Question #31

       Define the concepts of “presentation level” and “performance level”. Use a case history, in which you were the counselor, to show the necessity for moving from the presentation level to the performance level.

“Presentation level” refers to what the counselee presents (by their perception) as the problem(s), the issue that has motivated them to seek counsel.  It is possible that this may in reality be only part of the issue, or an effect of another cause, or a secondary problem-which would need to be lead out with perceptive data gathering.    

“Performance level” is the sinful actions or words causing or resulting from the presented problem.   These outwardly display how a person is responding to God, people, situations, and more.  “Presentation problems necessarily involve the discussion of performance problems, since the former arise from the latter; thus a discussion of the presentation problem may be the first step in digging deeper.”¹ 

The way counselees communicate with us a counselors is an interwoven knot of information in which they present perceived problems, emotions, specific details about their circumstances and more.  It is our responsibility to listen well, unweave the information and get to the heart level (“pre-conditioning level”) issues in order to help them change, not simply their behaviour, but their thinking, and motives to line up with Scripture. 

I personally counseled a college age young woman who conveyed to me that she could not get along with her Mom.  She told me her mother was “demanding, and impossible.”  As I listened empathetically, I took notes, allowing her to speak her heart and mind.  I then asked her; “And, how is that you respond to your Mom?”  “I get angry.” “What does that look like?” I probed.  “I don’t do what she asks, I slam my door,” she confessed sheepishly. Together we took time to look at Scripture, what it has to say about children and parental roles (Ephesians 6:1-4, Colossians 3:18-20).  She was defensive, justifying her behaviour because her Mom and Dad are divorced, and her Mom “isn’t perfect”.  This Mom is a believer, not abusive in anyway, an occasional church attender.  The word commands children obey parents, without condition I explained.    I addressed her bitterness about her parents divorce by explaining we are all sinners; parents, grandparents, kids…. how all sin is an offense to God-some with lasting effects/consequences, and others with less visible result, but all equally wrong and offensive to God (James 2:10).  I used some small booklets targeted at this topic for reading homework over our sessions together (“Life Beyond Your Parent’s Mistakes”-David Powlison, “Forgiveness: Showing Grace When You Have Been Hurt”-Rob Green), and she was also assigned to pray daily for her Mom-writing point form notes on what she was praying for specifically and bring these notes with her to sessions.    

With time, pointed Biblical teaching in our sessions (on grace, communication, dealing with anger, and more), and practical homework assignments she came to understand that God has been gracious in giving her salvation, and her Mom had the same salvation.  They are both sinners, and her own anger is a sinful response towards her Mom.  She needed to repent to God (1 John 1:9), and her Mom, and agree to no longer hold her parents divorce against them (Matthew 6:14,15), but to show grace and forgive as God has done to her (Matthew 6:12).  She did these things, and with intentional prayer, and specific assignments, their relationship changed for the better.   I saw her and her Mom at church together much later, and her mother came to me telling me their relationship had never been better, the counselee was showing respect and submission, even going out of her way to perform acts of love.  God and His truth applied to this situation resulted in a restored relationship. 

The presentation problem in this scenario was a difficult Mom, but the performance problems on the part of the counselee were anger, bitterness, a lack of forgiveness, and this resulted in actions of disrespect and defiance.  God’s truth had much to say about this issue-the presented one, and the performance ones, and when His truth is understood and yielded it can transform hearts, lives and relationships.      

¹ “Competent to Counsel”, Jay Adams, page 202     

Eclecticism | ACBC Exam Question #30

       Write a paragraph or two on the problem of eclecticism in counseling and your position in reference to it.

Eclectic means; “not following any one system, as of philosophy, medicine, etc., but selecting and using what are considered the best elements of all systems.”¹  Within counseling there are so many different approaches/theories/methods.  A few popular forms are; Client Centered (Carl Rogers), Holistic Health (Biopsychosocial), Strengths Based (Positive Thinking / Learned Optimism), Cognitive Behavioral (ABC Model), Solution Focused (Where do I really want to be?!) and Existential (Why am I here?!). Even within the term “Christian counseling there are many “versions” available, incorporating a hybrid of views from psychology, culture, self help/awareness concepts, with Scriptural concepts to address the needs of people.  It’s very difficult to wade through all the jargon of each counseling theory, and when you add in eclecticism on top of that, it’s just plain confusing.  Many are lead astray and blindly swallow anything presented under the umbrella of “Christian” counseling as Biblical, and truth based when there is a lot of dangerously deceptive teaching being presented under this false pretense.   

This is a problem because there is no consistency, there are often no absolutes/standards, and all these counseling theories and practices conflict with one another.  Either the Word of God is sufficient for life and our issues (2 Timothy 3:16), or it’s not.  Our practice proves our belief.  Do we hold to Sola Scriptura in how we conduct counseling or not? 

Personally I think psychology makes sense to the secular, unbelieving world.  It’s ideas of finding someone/something/your past/anything but you blame takes the onus of sin off the individual or renames it, again nullifying the responsibility.  I am sure they mean well, and have sincere passion to help people.    Unfortunately their anthropological view of man, their unclear moral standard, their unwillingness to believe in or yield to God and His authority, their worldview,  and the differences in methods used to find peace and solutions in life are all diametrically opposed to a Biblical view of life and counsel.  And Scripture warns you can’t serve two masters (Matthew 6:24).  I am not surprised by these countless varying theories, but I don’t believe a single one “holds water”.  I would never turn to them for help with my life, or include them in any counsel I give to anyone else. 

I do feel there are medical situations in which psychiatry is very helpful in biological issues of the brain (example: psychosis).  There may be aid in using psychology to describe a person’s condition, but the remedies it offers only teach people to love self, and follow feelings, to trade current idols that harm them for other idols that bring them contentment.  Without the gospel this is all it can accomplish, and though it may superficially appear effective for a time, it does not treat the underlying heart issue of sin.  The Gospel alone is the power of salvation (Romans 1:16), and people will continue to suffer in sin (Psalm 32:3) until they understand, believe and accept the truth of their guilt before God as sinners , their need for soul rescue, and turn to Christ as Saviour (Romans 6:23).  Then, and only then there is hope for real, lasting change.                         

¹ www.dictionary.com